Tuesday

It's a soft life, really.

I’ve been hastily returning all of my imprudent purchases, including the same bag I bought three times after having misread an Amex offer.

It’s a soft life, really.

I did, however, pay over $3 for this can of sparkling water that I’m drinking.

No fairies. No gold dust. There should be both. Or, it could taste good.

Groundbreaking.

It kind of tastes like a flat La Croix (correct pronunciation obligatory).

Is it Les Croix quand il y a plus qu’une seule boîte?

Who knows.

I just remembered that someone told me they gave their (very tiny) dog an entire can of seltzer. I haven’t tried it with my roommate.

I’ll do it tomorrow. Stay tuned.

He’s wearing a bow tie so he is unequivocally more stylish and put together than I at any given moment, including this one. His cuteness sine waves with less intensity: a steadfast cuteness, unaffected by excess sodium intake, irregular shower intervals, and (probably) low iron or something.

Lemon or lime, sir?